5th March 2017

Goats with fleshy pink eyes… eye catching aren’t they? They look back at you as well, really look back at you I mean. They’re on a par with snakes for looking back at you, but even then the goat will have to blink, unlike the snake; they just get their grip around your forearm and bore into your peepers.

The cat will do that too, but at least with the cat you know they’re probably up to no good, so you know where you are with them from the outset. Maybe the cat just wants some food but they ain’t gonna go begging about it. Labradors do, but they got them eyes that are made for begging, like the sheep but better because the Labrador doesn’t age over the course of one season. Sheep get a raw deal; we all know what piece they’d end up being on the chessboard. Yes you are correct, they’d be slaughtered and their bones used to make the chess board. Dignity is a precious thing, just ask the badger; he’s built like a low slung Jeff Capes, but can’t cross to the other side of the road without giving in for good. I had a Welsh pony once, but unlike the badger he wouldn’t give in. He’s passed on now, but at the time…

This is all getting ahead of where I was meant to be going. The goat; what does it know and what is it pretending not to know? I’m only asking because I couldn’t stop getting drawn back to that fleshy pink eye and forgetting my misgivings. They’re eye catching aren’t they? They look back at you as well, really look back at you I mean.

Hang on.

Was I about to make a comparison with snakes? That they’re on a par but snakes got the better grip and more bore per peeper? Well it’s true, same goes for the cat but it’s easier to know where you are with them and they won’t beg. If you want to see begging you really ought to see the Labrador. They get a better deal in life than the sheep. In the chess match of life the sheep is lucky if he’s ground into the board. Dignity is a precious thing my dear badger.

So where are we?

Jeff Capes? No I’m not getting involved in that again. He had some go in him though, didn’t he? Wouldn’t give in. Had a Welsh pony like that once, just like Capes. Never gave in. He’s passed on now, but at the time…

I feel like this isn’t getting us very far, and I’m not really examining the ground that I’ve mustered. It’s just that I’ve been at a farm today and something caught my eye with its own fleshy pink peepers. Yeah, it was a goat. What do you think about them? Yeah me too. I don’t know about you but I think the snake does a better job, and the cats are generally too preoccupied to know what the fuck is going on, so it’s down to them and Labradors. In which case you don’t vote for the sheep, they get nothing in life I’m afraid. Yeah I know it’s cruel but they aren’t my rules, bud. Capes went by the rules didn’t he? Damn straight. My Welsh pony didn’t though, he broke my spine but we carried on anyway. Damn straight.

He’s passed on now, but at the time…

Grab it by the Capes.

JW Bowe xx

PS

Anna urges to remind everyone that you shouldn’t lick your hands after hanging out with farm animals.

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